10 Celebrities Who Gave The Worst Relationship Advice

I’m not sure why interviewers are always asking celebrities for relationship advice; they don’t have the best track records. But nonetheless, we’re glad they do, because it makes for some entertaining reads! This list celebrates the bad and the ugly of celebrity relationship advice.

10. Adam Levine

Maroon 5 frontman has dated his fair share of knockouts, but he doesn’t exactly have the most romantic notions when it comes to dating. “You don’t want to show it all off on the first date, you know? Dress fancy, but go to McDonalds. Her world will be so rocked. You might be able to take her to the opera afterwards. If you don’t like her, you can just take her home.” Wow, how do I sign up? You think his Victoria’s Secret model girlfriends would be into cheese burgers? Come on…even if he dressed fancy?

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9. Patti Stanger

This professional matchmaker has a different brand of romance than the status quo. Patti Stanger is convinced that dating is a superficial game and one must be at their lowest possible weight to find Mr. Right. “I had to find a diet that would kick me back into dating shape, because I know that I can’t date at size 8. I have to date at size 2. And it’s just a fact of nature. Go get your injections and your chemical peels. You gotta look good to attract a man.” Sounds like everlasting love to me.

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8. Uma Thurman

Uma may just take the cake for the disher of the worst relationship advice. This Kill Bill sensation believes, “It’s better to have a relationship with someone who cheats on you than someone who doesn’t flush the toilet.” I’m hoping she was trying to be ironic, given her marriage to Ethan Hawke went down the tubes (punny) after rumors circulated that he was cheating with the nanny. Or I suppose it’s possible that she left him after bathroom battles over flushing the toilet. I say, beware the nanny…

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7. Angelina Jolie

It’s not surprising to hear that Angelina has an unconventional way of operating within her relationship with Brad Pitt. So far, while it seems to be working well for these two, I don’t think it’s sound advice for all. Jolie told German magazine Das Neue, “I doubt that fidelity is absolutely essential for a relationship. It’s worse to leave your partner and talk badly about him afterwards. Neither Brad nor I have ever claimed that living together means to be chained together. We make sure that we never restrict each other.” So, I still have a chance?

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6. Katy Perry

Katy Perry hit an all-time low when she and Russell Brand decided to divorce in 2012; unfortunately, her antagonistic feelings towards love were taken out on an unsuspecting bride-to-be. After crashing a bachelorette party in London, she was quoted as telling the soon-to-be blushing bride, “Let me tell you about permanence—it doesn’t exit.” Katy followed up with advice to call the whole thing off. Yikes!

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5. Gwyneth Paltrow

I’m not sure if this is terrible or fantastic relationship advice, but it’s made our list for its go-for-the-gusto approach. When Paltrow visited her friend Chelsea Handler’s show to promote Iron Man 3, Handler told her audience of advice she’d heard Gwyneth give: “One of her friends is like ‘I got into a big fight with my husband and I went home and I just wanted to scream and yell.’ And you [Gwyneth] were like, ‘Whatever you’re doing, do the opposite. If you feel angry, go at him with love and you give him a blow job.’’ Not a bad way to initiate communication about your feelings. It’s hard to see how her marriage to Chris Martin fell apart, but it may be worth a try.

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4. Julie Delpy

Julie made an attempt at giving men relationship advice to Esquire in 2007. Unfortunately her words may have lost their satiric tone leaving women sounding needy, controlling, hypocritical, and insecure. “We need you to be reachable at all times, but we don’t always pick up our phones when you call. We realize this seems like a double standard; if you’d like to discuss it further, just leave a message.”

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3. Megan Fox

It surprised me to learn that Megan Fox had an opinion about something, but it turns out she has a mad-hate on for men in their 20s. “Boys in their twenties are a waste of time. They have nothing to offer conversationally; they’re immature.” “Conversationally”? Is it wrong that I expected something more along the lines of “conversating” from the likes of Megan Fox? Oh well, more young men for the rest of us!

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2. Kelly Ripa

Okay, so this isn’t the worst advice, but it does leave us wondering exactly who Kelly Ripa’s friends are, and why this needs to be said. The talk show host was quoted as saying, “Don’t get divorced after your first argument! I have a lot of friends that have one fight and that’s it, they get divorced.” Really? A lot? Maybe the advice should be to take marriage seriously and work on problems as they arise, because this suggestion leaves me wondering if divorce is cool after the second fight.

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1. Ke$ha

Anyone that includes a dollar sign in their name, is certainly qualified to hand out relationship advice. Ke$ha believes that in order to get over a breakup, all one needs to do is, “Start by writing a nasty song about him, have your record come out all over the world, then make out with some hot bearded dude.” Yeah…I’ll get right on that. Maybe only the bearded dude part.

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Jessica Bowden